[ the words themselves aren't anything extreme. there's no quick jump to comforting him, or loose words in validating that he's a good person, and maybe that's why they come across as a lot more genuine. he knows sylus probably knows exactly what he's done.
his paintings, his voice, and the corpses that lay in wake of those mediums he uses. that's probably also why, it means a lot that he stays.
then again, maybe it's just laughable that it's a talk between two killers.
he's silent for a moment, before he releases an almost ironic sort of a half-laugh. ] You would say that.
I was once told by someone that "it wasn't that they forgot," but they chose their own happiness. That they moved on. Guess I just haven't figured out that last part. [ ... and maybe they're in the same boat in some ways.
[ He has heard stories, and if he thought Rafayel needed any advice from him, he would tell him that the language of your enemies can often be your greatest weapon. Use that understanding of their greed and their cruelty against them.
But he has nothing to teach him in that respect, so he doesn't offer him any assistance. He thinks that Rafayel could use it, but can't claim that he would accept it, and Sylus is a poor teammate, in any case.
He can offer his understanding, at least, though it might fall short of actual sympathy. It's hard to tell.
... ] How is a wound meant to heal when the blade is still lodged in it?
[ He is also not a picture of restraint. If there is something denying him what he wants, then he will remove it, regardless of the cost. What's the point in "moving on"? Becoming "better"? ]
Sometimes it is the world that needs to change, not you. [ Said arrogantly, but at least the smile he has when he looks at Rafayel seems self-aware. ]
You sure you aren't actually gunning for world destruction?
[ but, what sylus says isn't incorrect. he still hears the cries of his people in his sleep and they plague his every nightmare. maybe that's all the more reason that the grief he feels hasn't dulled since they've come to the surface. but, rafayel doesn't think about that now. almost like he lives in fear of the fact that if he dwells on it for too long, sylus would somehow know. as if he could read his heart.
maybe that's just the kind of vibe sylus gives. or maybe that's just how aware he is of his vulnerabilities.
[ He does smile at that, because well... He's not concerned with the world much. But if it's destroyed, then that might limit his ability to go on cute dates with the hunter.
Luckily for Rafayel, his eye on tells him about desire, not grief, so that much he can keep to himself. ]
No. [ Bluntly. ] There's still plenty I want to know.
[ How the hunter fits into all of this, primarily. He's curious, too, about the other Lemurians and what kind of lives they've built for themselves. What kind of life Rafayel wants for them... But he doubts he'll get that information today.
He's surprised Rafayel doesn't suspect he might want to abuse them himself. ]
On most tests, you don't get all the answers. Sometimes you have to take the pen and write them in yourself. [ as if to punctuate his point, he taps a finger over sylus' hand.
it's true that this is the extent of what he'll say. it's also the truth that it's more than he's told anyone outside of the context of what people have seen here, or his jokes about a sea god. ]
[ You want to hold hands? But he doesn't mind, carrying the weight of what Rafayel has shared, and prepared to use that to continue piecing together the story.
He tucks his shard into his jacket pocket, and then lifts a brow. ]
Thank you. Let's go of his hand so that he can focus on the view, like he said. Taking in the irritated expression, the length of his neck and the tension in his shoulders.
He really looks like a trapped animal.
The impulse that flashed in his head and chest cools, and he shifts back slightly. If Rafayel shoves him again, he'll go back. ]
maybe later when he finds an opening, he'll bank on that.
but as it stands, he can tell sylus seems oddly alert right now. isn't this supposed to be his bed time...? rafayel's eyes glance to the clock, but he's probably wrong. he feels a certain tension behind his gaze, and the silence that settles between the two of them. it's not uncomfortable being around sylus, but this position is kinda...
so he has no choice but to break the silence. ]
Are you done looking? [ he can't help the heat rising to his face. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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his paintings, his voice, and the corpses that lay in wake of those mediums he uses. that's probably also why, it means a lot that he stays.
then again, maybe it's just laughable that it's a talk between two killers.
he's silent for a moment, before he releases an almost ironic sort of a half-laugh. ] You would say that.
I was once told by someone that "it wasn't that they forgot," but they chose their own happiness. That they moved on. Guess I just haven't figured out that last part. [ ... and maybe they're in the same boat in some ways.
isn't that what keeps them coming back to her? ]
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But he has nothing to teach him in that respect, so he doesn't offer him any assistance. He thinks that Rafayel could use it, but can't claim that he would accept it, and Sylus is a poor teammate, in any case.
He can offer his understanding, at least, though it might fall short of actual sympathy. It's hard to tell.
... ] How is a wound meant to heal when the blade is still lodged in it?
[ He is also not a picture of restraint. If there is something denying him what he wants, then he will remove it, regardless of the cost. What's the point in "moving on"? Becoming "better"? ]
Sometimes it is the world that needs to change, not you. [ Said arrogantly, but at least the smile he has when he looks at Rafayel seems self-aware. ]
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[ but, what sylus says isn't incorrect. he still hears the cries of his people in his sleep and they plague his every nightmare. maybe that's all the more reason that the grief he feels hasn't dulled since they've come to the surface. but, rafayel doesn't think about that now. almost like he lives in fear of the fact that if he dwells on it for too long, sylus would somehow know. as if he could read his heart.
maybe that's just the kind of vibe sylus gives. or maybe that's just how aware he is of his vulnerabilities.
still— ] Have I satisfied your curiosity?
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Luckily for Rafayel, his eye on tells him about desire, not grief, so that much he can keep to himself. ]
No. [ Bluntly. ] There's still plenty I want to know.
[ How the hunter fits into all of this, primarily. He's curious, too, about the other Lemurians and what kind of lives they've built for themselves. What kind of life Rafayel wants for them... But he doubts he'll get that information today.
He's surprised Rafayel doesn't suspect he might want to abuse them himself. ]
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On most tests, you don't get all the answers. Sometimes you have to take the pen and write them in yourself. [ as if to punctuate his point, he taps a finger over sylus' hand.
it's true that this is the extent of what he'll say. it's also the truth that it's more than he's told anyone outside of the context of what people have seen here, or his jokes about a sea god. ]
Now is it my turn?
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He tucks his shard into his jacket pocket, and then lifts a brow. ]
I don't have any secrets.
[ Except those relating to his business. ]
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That sounds like something someone who has a ton of them would say, actually.
[ ... ] You don't want to tell me about what you get up to?
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Are you that interested in Onychinus? Are you going to ask for the armoury passwords and my bank PIN next?
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tries to shoo sylus' hand further away from him. ]
Your weapons don't interest me, and do I look broke to you?
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You look greedy.
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That depends on what I want. [ ... and don't they both know what that is? ]
Anyway, I'm tired. Turn on a movie or something.
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Pornography plays. ]
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rafayel turns to stare at him. give him the remote. ]
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Hands him the remote. ]
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and it's also pornography. ]
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he turns off the tv to pout in silence. ]
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he plants his hands down and tries to get up, before he almost hits his head on sylus'— ]
Move over. [ why are you making him a bottom ]
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Stays put. ]
I'm taking in the view.
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[ trying to touch the console for the lights in the room...
he struggles before just pushing sylus' chest instead because it's easier. ]
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[ ?
Takes the hand pushing his chest and holds it. ]
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[ he looks at the hand sylus is holding...
and he applies a bit more pressure before giving up and laying back. he sighs loudly like a pet who doesn't pay rent. ]
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Thank you. Let's go of his hand so that he can focus on the view, like he said. Taking in the irritated expression, the length of his neck and the tension in his shoulders.
He really looks like a trapped animal.
The impulse that flashed in his head and chest cools, and he shifts back slightly. If Rafayel shoves him again, he'll go back. ]
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maybe later when he finds an opening, he'll bank on that.
but as it stands, he can tell sylus seems oddly alert right now. isn't this supposed to be his bed time...? rafayel's eyes glance to the clock, but he's probably wrong. he feels a certain tension behind his gaze, and the silence that settles between the two of them. it's not uncomfortable being around sylus, but this position is kinda...
so he has no choice but to break the silence. ]
Are you done looking? [ he can't help the heat rising to his face. ]
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